Clearly I am missing something here. Us? A guilty pleasure? I think it’s more like that trainwreck you can’t tear yourself from no matter how hard you try. Craftastrophe is the equivalent of toilet paper stuck to your shoe while you walk around the hottest most trendiest bar in the city. It’s the spinach stuck between your teeth when you smile at The Guy you’ve been crushing on For-Evah!

We’ve been a little slow around here (As if you haven’t noticed. Seriously? The emails begging for posts? So awesome!), we’ve broken our feed (Can’t seem to get that bitch back online. Feedburner is a red-headed step child. I’d so like to give it a beat down.), and yet you’re still here.

No I am not crying. I have something stuck in my eye. And I’m still sick, leemeealone.

So really, it’s not like I should even bother asking since you’ve done so much already just by hanging around while we get our poop together; but I’m going to. I’m going to ask you for one more teenie tiny little thing.

A vote.

Since we got our butts beaten so badly in the other award thingie. No matter. It’s not like we didn’t have some stiff competition – like um, ETSY! Seriously. No one has a chance against a gem like that.

Especially one that showcases beauts like this:

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I think of both a neti pot and tea when I see this: and that’s not very comforting. Not in the least.

Can I just say that I worry that the refuse from the nostril opposite the neti pot would drip in my mouth and I ain’t havin’ none of that.

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Um. What the what?!

That how you Craftastrophe lovers make my boogers feel. Like dancing.

Git down wit yer bad self.

So, if you have a moment, please stop by and vote DAILY for Craftastrophe at the Social Luxe Lounge.

Click the image at the top of the post (OR THIS LINK), or the one in the sidebar (OR THIS LINK) and help us beat the pants off those other wannabe Guilty Pleasures.

HALP!

HALP!

HALP!

I know posts have been behind lately and I’m so very sorry or that. See, I’ve recently returned to work after a year long maternity leave and things are little hairy at the moment with new routine and illness abound. We’ve been sick, sick, sick. The kinda sick where you could shove a tampon up each nostril and just leave them there to sop up the running snot.

Nice visual, right? You’re welcome.

And! What a great segue because look at this beauty I came across!

It’s *apparently* a wedding dress.

Yes. SERIOUSLY.

All I see is a gigantic TAMPON.

A gigantic PRAYING TAMPON.

But, praying for WHAT!?

Not to be used maybe?

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I don’t know that the head piece is even the best part. The rainbow feathered hat / wig / dead macaw mulched in a lawn mower and tossed on his head looks fun and intriguing… but I think I am totally taken in by the rainbow lipstick. LOL

Not to mention the reflection in the mirror showing the ginormous boobies he’s wearing.

At least… I think he’s a he…

From the listing:

These elaborate one-of-a-kind sculptural creations are made to order with durable construction. All feather headpieces come with matching feather eyebrows (you can eyelash glue them over your real brows).

Glue the eyebrows to my eyebrows? That’s just asking for trouble when they have to come off isn’t it?

Regardless, I am going to ask for the entire ensemble for this year’s Gay Pride Parade.

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Please know that I am not making fun of the gay community. I love gay people and pride parades!

Or I have a throat in my frog, or I’m in a frog throat, or something.

From the listing:

On the remote island of GrotenRa scientists have discovered a giant man eating frog. This frog has the unique ability to swallow a human whole, in one gulp. The frog will then digest the human’s body, however the human’s head and brain is left intact and continues to function inside the frog. The man inside the frog can apparently live for 200 years in this frogified state. It is unknown what effect this has on the human brain. Does the human begin to think for the frog, or does it desire to be free of its captor?

Creeeeepy!

Thanks Alana!

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This isn’t actually a chicken nugget, but it plays one on television.

From the listing:

Citrine is known as a “success” stone because it is said in folklore to promote success and abundance, especially in business and commerce. Placing a cluster or crystal of citrine in ones cash box has produced more income for the merchant. It not only assists the merchant in acquiring wealth, but helps to maintain a state of wealth. Its lore also says that it enhances mental clarity, confidence, happiness and will power. Citrine is purported to bring good fortune, sometimes in very unexpected ways. Citrine is also a good general protection stone according to crystal healing lore. It is said to alleviate depression and self-doubt, and diminish irrational mood swings due to the effect of mental clarity it has. In traditional folklore and crystal healing lore it is said to aid the digestion and eliminate nightmares that disturb one’s sleep.

Do you want fries with that?

Thanks StumpTown Crafts!

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