With St Patrick’ s Day approaching, do you find yourself looking for the perfect accessory to complement your outfit?

Something that would be at home in the office, school or the titty city bar  ?

Look no further than these unique “dreadfalls” ……

As an added bonus, they can be quickly removed in case all of that green beer decides to reappear and you don’t have another dancer a friend to hold your hair back.

Dreadful Dreadfall indeed ……

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Kim learned as a young lass to avoid any clothing item with the word “dread” in it.

Hey you guys! I was pulling the plastic flamingos out of my front yard to make this headdress…is that two words? Head dress? I don’t know, you guys this ain’t a dress for your head but it sure is pretty! So, anyway, you guys I was pulling the pink plastic flamingos out of my front yard to make this “piece of art” when I realized…This art oughta be photographed in front of MY favorite piece of art. I present to you guys my totally rad headdress, photographed in front of the painting that John Wayne Gacy sent to me as a thank you for the many erotic letters I sent to him about my clown fetish. Etsy made me take down the erotic poem I originally had with this listing, so I had to change it to this:

This piece is a one of a kind. Where do I start. It is a headband with a huge bow on top made of pink, orange, and green florescent tulle, with a doll’s head in the middle. The doll has a sequened crown and there are two flamingos on each side of the bow. The headband is covered in blue tinsel material. It is not heavy though and will not weigh your head down. Anywhere you wear this to, you will be noticed. It is truly a piece of art and this is the only one I have ever made like it.

What I didn’t say is that this piece is meant to be worn with the lingerie that I made with the melted barbie heads on the nips.

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Thanks, Cari!

flutter writes on her personal blog byflutter, sometimes.

I was so excited when I came across the thing I planned to blog for my first Craftastrophe post.  It was horrific.  It was gross.  It was the kind of inexplicable mistake that is the definition of this site.

So imagine my surprise when I finally sat down to compose, and out of left field came this thing’s ugly step-sister.  This thing’s ugly, naked, wart-faced, hunch-backed troll of a step-sister, barreling down on me at top speed with seven bloody, sparkly tampons clutched in her fat, waxy talons.

I give you the “Absolutely Genius Tampon Windchimes Essence of Life Windchimes.”

In addition to having a title that just won’t quit, these wind chimes promise to “remind you why being a woman is so wonderful” (because the best part of any woman’s month is when red glitter pours out of her lady bits).

The chimes feature sturdy bamboo craftsmanship, “100% real tampons,” and “[a] vintage jewelry peice…showcasing the essence of woman.”

Apparently, the “essence of woman” is that cheap necklace you wore in third grade until its fake chain started turning your neck green.

Sure, you could pay $15 for plain ol’ bamboo chimes that clink and, you know, chime in the wind–OR you could pay $25 (plus shipping) for these!

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Renee finds more appropriate uses for glitter at The Brisk Blog.

Okay, I see no a little resemblance.

With all the emphasis on the minute details, I am curious as to why it was altered to include…

(more…)

You can’t just jam stones and a bar of moldy soap into soft brass all willy nilly and slap a $1200 price tag on a crap-ass looking ring and expect people to pay that.

There’s a good reason why your ring was added to Etsy on January 5th as “On sale till Sunday” and it NEVER SOLD.

Idjit.

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