“She never uses this one. I bet she won’t even notice it’s gone… This is going to be so awesome! She’s going to love it. This and the cutlery from the china cabinet? She hasn’t used that in forever! So amazing. I’m brilliant!”

:::

“Honey! Have you seen my tea pot? The Jones’ are going to be here soon! I need the good tea pot. I can’t serve Betty tea is this old thing. I’ll be the talk of the euchre club. – Speaking of the tea pot, all my cutlery is gone too!”

“Nope, sweetie! Haven’t seen them.”

*whispers* Ah crap! Crap! Crap! Crap!

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Barbie herself would be pretty pleased with this Pretty in Pink version of the almighty girl-throne.

At $2100, this lovely number isn’t cheap, but the only thing that keeps running through my mind is how in the heck would you clean all that grout?  Call me a germ-a-phobe, but it just seems to me that all those nooks and crannies would be ideal places for poo germs to have an all out crazy-ass rave, complete with glow necklaces and boomboomboomboom and poppin’ ecstasy all up those little VIP rooms between all that toilet bling.

So um, ew.  Say no to drugs, kids.

Thanks Nic!

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Karen and I would love to wish our Americus friends a very Happy 4th of July! I hope you’re enjoying your hot dogs, hamburgers and family gatherings.

(Psssst. Today is also Karen’s birthday!)

Happy Birthday Karen!!

When it comes to the fourth of July, I always think of the Team America: World Police theme song (if you click the link please beware that it’s explicit and NSFW, old people, or most family gatherings).

(It’s likely entirely inappropriate seeing as I am Canadian and it’s a parody of America but! I mean no disrespect, it’s just funny and makes me laugh.)

(This site hasn’t ever been known for being appropriate or non-judgmental, has it? I mean, you have read it, right?)

(If you have a moment, I highly recommend reading the comments on the YouTube thread. Hilarious!)

And if you’re so inclined, you could sport this beaut to the fireworks show this evening!

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Maybe a new resin Barbie face necklace?

From the listing:

For this pendant, I used the bluest eyes, the reddest lips, and the whitest cap I could find!

This pendant measures two inches long and 1.5 inches wide, and half an inch deep. Shipped on black rubber tubing with a little black cap for the toggle clasp. (It would probably look a lot better on a gold chain.)

(I always laugh when a crafter states that they could have something different to make their item more appealing but chose not to.)

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And now, the grand finale! The grand poobah!

If this isn’t upcycled I don’t know what is!

From the listing:

This is a ONE OF A KIND design!! Here is a very patriotic Uncle Sam holding his American Flag!! His face is a copy from an antique picture from my collection! His body is made from vintage silvery gray and sky blue chenille stems ~ a vintage silver Christmas light bulb reflector is behind his head to add some holiday sparkle ~ blue tinsel pipe cleaner hanger!

(P.S. I think “vintage chenille stems” is code for “used pipe cleaners”)

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Have a great 4th of July America!

Love your Crazy Canuck friends!

I don’t know that the head piece is even the best part. The rainbow feathered hat / wig / dead macaw mulched in a lawn mower and tossed on his head looks fun and intriguing… but I think I am totally taken in by the rainbow lipstick. LOL

Not to mention the reflection in the mirror showing the ginormous boobies he’s wearing.

At least… I think he’s a he…

From the listing:

These elaborate one-of-a-kind sculptural creations are made to order with durable construction. All feather headpieces come with matching feather eyebrows (you can eyelash glue them over your real brows).

Glue the eyebrows to my eyebrows? That’s just asking for trouble when they have to come off isn’t it?

Regardless, I am going to ask for the entire ensemble for this year’s Gay Pride Parade.

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Please know that I am not making fun of the gay community. I love gay people and pride parades!

After hearing a radio commercial for the new Kentucky Fried Chicken campaign for Mother’s Day (Moms Night Off!), Sam turned to me and said, “If someone gave me a bucket of chicken for Mother’s Day, I’d rip his member off, shove it down his throat and pull it out his cornholio.”

Sam has issues.

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