I know what you’re thinking.  But just wait.  It gets better.

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You know, I think this one pretty much speaks for itself.  Technically I suppose it IS hunting season.  But really?  There’s nothing that makes this ok.  Nothing.

Of course it’s mounted on knotty pine.  *Sigh*

Now I can’t stop picturing it singing “Take Me To The River” like one of those creepy bass fish gag gifts.  Crap.  I’m never going to sleep again, am I?

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Elly Lou celebrates free range, hormone free, sustainably farmed vaginas.

If lady bits make you squeamish, then this post is probably not for you.

If you have a problem with bats, also probably not for you.

And if you have anything other than positive feelings about blue Fimo clay, then this post is definitely not for you.  But in that case you also probably have no sense of humor, which means that this entire site probably isn’t for you.

However, if you think stupid crafts made of Fimo clay that relate to lady bits and bats could be funny, then you should probably read on.

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I’d love to stay here and share countless witty observations about this fetching accessory, but I can’t suppress my overwhelming urge to scurry to the nearest mall and buy a new sports bra.  Scratch that, I’m going to replace all my bras with those terrifying, uber-supportive eighteen hour numbers.  I’d like to keep my girls sitting above the waist, thanks very much.

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Elly Lou would like to thank her mother for teaching her the importance of under wires.

Many people turn to religion to find a warm, safe haven.  It doesn’t get much warmer than this, folks.

Click for Uncensored Image

Because everyone should have affordable access to fine art, the artist has issued affordable 8×10 prints for the low, low price of $20.  I’m thinking about buying one to replace some of the artwork at the apartment I’m house sitting.

Because I just couldn’t choose between all the horrible potential names for this Craftastrophe, I’ve included them all.  Feel free to vote for your favorite in the comments.  While you’re at it, you should probably pray for my heathen soul.

• Jesus Wuz Here
• God’s Playground
• Not Just Any Port in the Storm
• A Painting of Clitical Proportions
• Parting of the Red Sea
• Peek-a-boo
• Yay Though I Walk Through the Valley of Ew
• I Can Haz Labia

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Elly Lou hopes they have a wet bar in Hell.