Craftastrophe » Knitting Nightmare

Fun? I Don’t Think That Word Means What You Think It Means.

suebob — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 15:07:41 +0000

I think it was Robert Louis Stevenson who said “The world is so full of a number of things, I’m sure we should all be happy as kings.”

Maybe we should stop with the things. We have enough. Evidence:

A teratoma is a type of tumor. They have been known to contain eyes, teeth, hair, partially formed organs, and limbs. Sometimes it takes the form of a bulbous mass, with it’s parts hidden within; other times it may have hands or little legs sticking out.

This teratoma is full of parts that you can have fun disecting from the tumourous sac, or position in a variety of ways to display your teratoma as you see fit.

{Source} 30 tumorous dollars

Not the same, but still fun:

What’s eating your neck?

suebob — Mon, 02 Jan 2012 15:57:29 +0000

Scarf necklace? Is this the next curse to befall fashion? Because this:

…looks like some giant parasite has escaped her body and has attacked her neck. Not a look I’d try to affect, but your mileage may vary.
{Source} $27 worth of terror.

Not the same, but still fun:

Making it too easy

suebob — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 16:21:36 +0000

These were on etsy’s front page today:

They’re making it too easy. As someone who is celebrating New Years Day by being very lazy, I’d like to say thank you.
{Source} $28 warm and fuzzy dollars.

Not the same, but still fun:

Quick, call Operation Rescue

suebob — Wed, 28 Dec 2011 14:00:50 +0000

It’s a catnip toy. Imagine the surprised expressions on the faces of your Bible Study group when your Siamese, Mittens, comes out with this in his mouth.

{Source} $12.00 worth of entertainment

Not the same, but still fun:

It’s not all about the Crafts

suebob — Sat, 17 Dec 2011 00:01:46 +0000

This one is about the model. Could they have found someone who looks less thrilled to be photographed in an fuzzy avocado neck warmer?

I can hear the conversation now:
“Oh, hey, Carl, so glad you’re finally awake. Can you put down your bong and do me a favor?”
“What?”
“Oh, just wear this scarf for a minute while I take your picture?”
“Are you kidding?”
“No, I really need to get this done.”
“You know I look like crap in avocado.”
“No, you look like crap because you never comb your hair or shave. You look fine in avocado.”
{Source} $50 or will trade for a good recommendation for a new roommate.

Not the same, but still fun:

And then, giant Q-Tips attacked my neck

suebob — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 11:00:41 +0000

You were just LOOKING for an excuse to break out the really giant needles. We understand.

{Source}

Not the same, but still fun:

I’m sorry, but you’re going to have to wait for Casual Friday to wear that

suebob — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 22:40:37 +0000

…and I hope the weather is warm because otherwise BRRRRRR

{Source} $585 probably dry clean only

Some more like this one:

If I only had a…hat?

suebob — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 16:00:05 +0000

As Curly of the Three Stooges said “I try to think, but nothing happens!” Curly and I could both use one of these awesome brain hats:

Pattern is a free Ravelry download from Alicia Williams. Imagine the looks you’d get knitting this at the PTA meeting.

{Source}

Some more like this one:

I’m baaaaaack

suebob — Tue, 25 Oct 2011 03:29:51 +0000

Karen and Sam agreed to let me take over the blog. It just goes to show you, kids – whining will get you everywhere.

Yippee! Weird crafts live! Shall we begin? It’s not like there’s any shortage of odd stuff out there:

Dress as breakfast this winter! A bacon scarf and a fried egg hat to go with – my hair feels greasier already!

After knitting, the set is felted to achieve maximum bacon-resembling properties (also making it warm and cozy).

{Source}

Not the same, but still fun:

First, you grab it by the tail

suebob — Thu, 10 Feb 2011 18:00:41 +0000

This scarf would make a lovely gift. It is lovely, isn’t it? So soft. And handmade.

I thought I’d love a scarf like this, until I found out what it was made of.

Possum fur (and alpaca, to be fair. But POSSUM).

POSSUM FUR.

Have you ever met a possum? I had one who used to visit my back yard to drink the black water that sometimes oozed from the compost heap. Yeah. The freakiest, most disgusting little animals on earth.

So this brings up questions. How does one get possum fur to make possum yarn?

Road kill?

Possum grooming?

Or are there…shudder…possum farms?

This scarf has raised too many bad questions in my mind for me to ever look at it the same way again. Sigh.

And it was so pretty.

{Source}

Suebob has a dog that could help her get some possums.