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I wanna be just like Flava Flav

I just can’t think of one occasion for where this may be suitable.

Guess that just makes me a straight edged stick in the mud, because really? I mean. You could wear mold just about anywhere. Right?

il 430xN.73169000 I wanna be just like Flava Flav

Don’t get me wrong. It’s cute, and well crafted; just… uh…. WHY?

I just can’t decide if it’s the moldy bread or the intestinal tract I like better.

il 430xN.88217785 I wanna be just like Flava Flav

Another thing…When I first read the dimensions I saw 4.5 and immediately thought inches (even though it’s actually centimeters) – and 4.5 inches? THAT’S HUGE. You’d be walkin’ around like Fava Flav with those intestines dangling from a gaudy chain.

flavorflavnewswire400a111606 I wanna be just like Flava Flav

{source}

Then you could be all: FLLLAAVVVVAAA FLAAAAV. But not.

P.S. Flava Flav is 50!!!?! WTF!?

P.P.S. I feel old.

{source}

Posted by sam {temptingmama} on October 2, 2009
Celebrities Give Me Hives, Disturbing Things We Should Never Own, Guaranteed Not to Improve Your Report Card, Podunk Pottery |
{ 7 Comments }

Birds of a Feather, kinda.

I imagine walking down a busy city street on a brisk cool morning. Cloaked in my trench coat and a hat, the leaves crunch under my feet as the season’s first frost has crystallized the fallen, orange and red.

Then it happens.

The birds.

They start bopping their heads as their skinny little legs shuffle their fat over stuffed bodies in my direction.

One takes flight.

Then another, and another…

My hat!!!

mess hat Birds of a Feather, kinda.

messhat2 Birds of a Feather, kinda.

messhat3 Birds of a Feather, kinda.

I suppose it’s really a good option for all those left over pieces of yarn….

Also? So something I could make.

I have NO talent whatsoever – but that’s neither here nor there because this ‘pattern’ is one ANYONE could use, right?

{source}

Posted by sam {temptingmama} on October 1, 2009
Guaranteed Not to Improve Your Report Card, Knitting Nightmare |
{ 13 Comments }

Whatever you do, do NOT touch the good silver

“She never uses this one. I bet she won’t even notice it’s gone… This is going to be so awesome! She’s going to love it. This and the cutlery from the china cabinet? She hasn’t used that in forever! So amazing. I’m brilliant!”

:::

“Honey! Have you seen my tea pot? The Jones’ are going to be here soon! I need the good tea pot. I can’t serve Betty tea is this old thing. I’ll be the talk of the euchre club. – Speaking of the tea pot, all my cutlery is gone too!”

“Nope, sweetie! Haven’t seen them.”

*whispers* Ah crap! Crap! Crap! Crap!

teapot chimes Whatever you do, do NOT touch the good silver

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Posted by sam {temptingmama} on September 28, 2009
Guaranteed Not to Improve Your Report Card, Ornamental Psychosis, This Centerpiece Might Make Your Guests Coil in Fear |
{ 4 Comments }

Just because you can….

Does NOT mean you should.

hotpants Just because you can....

70’s called. They want their shorts back.

BTW. I bet these babies would give ya a TOTAL camel toe. Just sayin’.

crochet pants1 Just because you can....

Who wears short shorts!?

knittedintimates Just because you can....

*scritch, scritch, scritch* I just don’t know…. I think it may be um… HOT and well, itchy. Knitted thong? Ya. Um. I… No.

Hot pants {source}, Shorts {source}, Intimates {source}

Posted by sam {temptingmama} on September 13, 2009
Fantastic Felt Up, For The Insane, Guaranteed Not to Improve Your Report Card, Knitting Nightmare, You Can Stop Making Crafts Now |
{ 17 Comments }

Gaia Birdhouse

gaia birdhouse Gaia Birdhouse

And by Gaia, I mean blow-up doll. *gasp*

Thanks Diamond!

{source}

Posted by Karen Sugarpants on July 2, 2009
Guaranteed Not to Improve Your Report Card |
{ 3 Comments }

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