Craftastrophe » Fantastic Felt Up

Breakfast of Champions (or Pimps)

sam {temptingmama} — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 17:00:21 +0000

I’ll have two eggs, over easy. Toast, white, and three slices of bacon.

Oh, and make my bacon pimp, please.

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Not the same, but still fun:

I used to like chenille….

sam {temptingmama} — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 15:00:37 +0000

Sweet Baby Jeebus!!

Someone didn’t get their Swine Zombie Flu shot…

Thanks Liz!!

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Not the same, but still fun:

Shootin’ blanks

sam {temptingmama} — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 00:45:09 +0000

From the listing:

Whether you’re feeling like a peacemaker or wish you could take out a little bit of aggression*, everyone wishes they had a gun sometimes.

Named for the famous frontierswoman, prostitute, and professional scout, Calamity Jane, best known for being an acquaintance to Wild Bill Hickok. This gun is made from electric pink fabric with black handle detail and 2 white bones on either side.

Hand-sewn. Actual purchases will vary slightly.

Measures approx. 8 inches in length.

* Plush guns are less likely to get you sentenced to life in prison.

Maybe it’s the Canadian in me, but I can’t say I’ve ever been disappointed to NOT have a gun… until now…

Too bad there wasn’t some plush bullets – with glitter, they HAVE to have glitter – I could throw while I pretend to shoot at a passerby.

Thanks Reba Jane!

{source}

Not the same, but still fun:

A caring loving face to wake up to…

sam {temptingmama} — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 19:40:56 +0000

From the listing:

This felted tea pot warmer, created by Pen, is made from a recycled sweater, wet felted, cut into shape, and hand sculpted. Buck measures approximately 32cms by 22cms.

Buck will give your tea pot incredible warmth and undying companionship. A worthy addition to your kitchen.

It’s truly amazing what $100 can buy you these days…

Thanks Reba Jane!

{source}

Not the same, but still fun:

Rico is Suave

sam {temptingmama} — Sat, 17 Oct 2009 17:00:18 +0000

Rico is a rock star! He rocks so hard, he rocks two animal prints at once!

Rico is made of bright blue leopard print velboa (fake fur). All of his facial features are hand sewn, from his zebra ears and goatee, to his green felt flaming eye shadow and purple button eyes, right down to his rock-star blue and yellow plaid lips!

Rico’s big mouth isn’t just for thrashin’ vocals, but big enough to stash a few small treasures of your own. Rico is stuffed just enough to be buff, but not so tough he can’t stand a hug or two. His massive fleece tongue also pulls out for major attitude! You know what they say about rock stars…

Um. That’s a bit of an open ended question, isn’t it?

Looks to me like he’s barfing out his insides rather than showing off a Rock N’ Roll tongue.

Rico, you’re so suave.

{source}

Some more like this one:

Nana smokes the spliff at Bingo

sam {temptingmama} — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 00:55:26 +0000

Nana? Is that you?

IDA still works 9 to 5
And loves her smoking breaks.
She wins at Bingo Friday nights
And smokes up what she makes!

Ida is a one of a kind 100% wool sculpture handmade by me with long sharp needle-felting needles.
She is smoking a cigarette complete with smoke, and is wearing her favorite dangling earrings.

Ida is now ready to retire and wants to come live with you!
She arrives to you [from my smoke-free home] in her coordinating glass stand.

Doesn’t ’smokes up’ usually refer to getting high?

Nana is getting high?!!

Getting high while perched on top of a dildo candle stick. She’s a head. On a dildo candle stick.

Smoking spliffs.

{source}

Not the same, but still fun:

Monet Inspired?

sam {temptingmama} — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 13:59:18 +0000

** Have you entered our fabulous giveaway for a 75 dollar gift certificate to Eden Fantasys? Time’s running out!**

:::

When I think Monet, I think unique, colourful, beauty, peaceful – and most of all – ART.

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I’m sorry to say, this item? Shows NONE of those attributes.

I’m curious to know what Monet would think of this creation inspired by his work.

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Not the same, but still fun:

Crochet, Halloween Style

sam {temptingmama} — Sun, 04 Oct 2009 16:02:10 +0000

I’ve really developed a penchant for crochet.

There aren’t a lot of pieces I dislike anymore. Hell, even doilies are on my nice list.

There’s something to be said for the talent that goes into a lot of the pieces people create. The meticulous and painstaking care put into some of their work is clearly is evident.

Some? It’s definitely there, but just not as easy to see.

Sometimes the phrase “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” just doesn’t do justice.

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Some more like this one:

Please pass the mushrooms!

sam {temptingmama} — Sat, 03 Oct 2009 18:08:35 +0000

Uhhhhhhhhh….

Ummmmm…

Wellll….

I….

Huh?

*crickets*

There. Are. No. Words.

Ahem.

*clears throat*

But! It has FRIENDS!

*crickets*

I. KNOW.

See the thing is: when I think “plush pillow”, I think “soft”, “cuddly”, “sleep”, “drool”, “snore”.

Now I want my bed.

This looks like itchy, scratchy, painted canvas.

To each their own I suppose.

PLUSH. *pfffft*

P.S. That dog (I think it’s a dog) looks how I feel.

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Some more like this one:

Just because you can….

sam {temptingmama} — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 00:58:23 +0000

Does NOT mean you should.

70’s called. They want their shorts back.

BTW. I bet these babies would give ya a TOTAL camel toe. Just sayin’.

Who wears short shorts!?

*scritch, scritch, scritch* I just don’t know…. I think it may be um… HOT and well, itchy. Knitted thong? Ya. Um. I… No.

Hot pants {source}, Shorts {source}, Intimates {source}

Craftastrophe » Fantastic Felt Up

Breakfast of Champions (or Pimps)

Not the same, but still fun:

I *used* to like chenille….

Not the same, but still fun:

Shootin’ blanks

Not the same, but still fun:

A caring loving face to wake up to…

Not the same, but still fun:

Rico is Suave

Some more like this one:

Nana smokes the spliff at Bingo

Not the same, but still fun:

Monet Inspired?

Not the same, but still fun:

Crochet, Halloween Style

Some more like this one:

Please pass the mushrooms!

Some more like this one:

Just because you can….

Some more like this one:

I used to like chenille….