Ever have that one pesky person in your life who has an answer for everything? How to clean the windows better? How to avoid turning your whites pink? When to hang the laundry? Yes. One. Of. Those.

Maybe a mother-in-law who critiques and / or mocks your cooking in front of others?

This my friend; this is for you.

Invite that pesky do-gooder over for dinner. Maybe some pasta so it covers the bottom entirely?

Watch them as they quietly tell themselves how they would have made the sauce, presented the meal and wonder where you picked up your plain ol’ off white dinnerware. After all, they would have likely served in the good china.

Then suddenly it comes into view…

They look but don’t speak…

Shear terror crosses their face as they jump from the table clutching their mouth and spitting their dinner into their hand.

Maybe even a single tear falls – you know the one. It creeps out only when one experiences a hell of a scare.

What you don’t have that? Oh. Well. Ahem. Carry on.

I am smiling now just at the thought of scaring the utter CRAP outta someone with these plates.

Mine? Mine would have to have a rat.

Now I think I have to start my Christmas shopping….

{source}

Stoner Cat,

Stoner Cat,

What are they feeding you?

Stoner Cat,

Stoner Cat,

It’s not your fault….

From the listing:

free shipping!

Heh.

What kills me in the look on the cat’s face.  And goodness knows your parents will never suspect this item for drug paraphernalia.  Nah, never.

Just say no, kids!

Thanks Genevieve!

{source}

…to me, it still doesn’t look like a cake or a piece of cake.  It looks like felt with crafty things piled on it.

This slayed me, however:

Getting the shape of this thing was the most difficult of the entire process. Next, came the icing. At first I wanted to do an all foam magnet, but I came up with something more interesting. I took some pipe cleaners (no, they’re not used lol*) and curled them, cut them, and glued them on for a fluffy icing look. And of course, what cake would be the same if it didn’t have a cherry on top?

Question: what were you drinking at the time?

Yes, you can stop making crafts now. Now.  NOW.

*Used for WHAT?

Thanks Cari!

{source}

WHY?

WHHHHHHYYYYYY?????

Thanks Suebob!

{source}

Barbie herself would be pretty pleased with this Pretty in Pink version of the almighty girl-throne.

At $2100, this lovely number isn’t cheap, but the only thing that keeps running through my mind is how in the heck would you clean all that grout?  Call me a germ-a-phobe, but it just seems to me that all those nooks and crannies would be ideal places for poo germs to have an all out crazy-ass rave, complete with glow necklaces and boomboomboomboom and poppin’ ecstasy all up those little VIP rooms between all that toilet bling.

So um, ew.  Say no to drugs, kids.

Thanks Nic!

{source}